Tuesday, 13 April 2010

Blah Blah Blah

I've just tried about sixteen times to write my blog. And I can't get into the groove tonight. Which is a shame because the kids are in bed, The Husband is working late and there is no American crap on telly. I was making excuses to myself like 'oh well I've got to do packed lunches' and 'there's school uniform to iron' which even I can't fall for when in fact it's school holidays. I could fake a blog, pretty much in the same way I sometimes fake something else (hell, I need my sleep!) but then you guys would be suspicious in the way The Husband always is. I could nick someone else's blog but all the ones I have been looking at are by families really into their kids so everyone would know I'd stolen it.
So instead I am going to write a poem. An ode to my lost blog.
My head is all fuzzy
Filled with smoke and fog
Hello baby brain
Goodbye blog

You can tell I've not had much adult conversation today. The Eldest One was at a mates so I decided to take The Tomboy out for lunch while The Toddler slept in his buggy. Except The Toddler only slept for 8 minutes. And The Tomboy didn't give a monkeys about bonding with her mother over lunch. The conversation was basically me saying "Please don't" and "Let's go".
I used to be pretty good at conversation, especially the adult variety. I could tell funny stories and the occasional joke. I would even go as far to say I had a natural talent for chatting. Alas, seven years of interrupted conversation has taken its toll on me and it's pretty hard to get a full sentence out. It goes something like:
"Well what I think is...(Kids, Can You Stop That Now!!!)...emmm ehhhh....(Right You Get Upstairs Until Dinner) really should go for it because...(I Said Now!!!!)...sorry, call you back in a minute...
I just googled 'Adult Conversation' and it was depressing because I didn't understand anything that came up. Like Climate Change and The Media Revolution. So here's a little list of subjects for Adults (With Demanding Children) Conversations. Which is apt because The Husband said earlier that I only have 8 topics of conversation these days:
1) How many times I am interrupted when trying to speak to a friend
2) Sorry I've just got to change his nappy situations
3) Let's talk about which kids we like and which we don't
4) Why I don't care anymore when he/she cries
5) I need a night out
6) My husband is really getting on my nerves
7) I really want to lose weight/give up smoking/not have special love tonight
8) Paranoia in the playground (was she funny with you??? he didn't even say hello to me. etc.)

I can tell you I am very very good at these conversations, I've had seven years of practice. But don't expect a full uninterrupted sentence.

quick note: The Husband tried to talk to me about a situation at his work last night and I totally panicked. All I heard was ' two hours...' And it's funny because I always moan that he never talks to me about his work. And I really protest when he says it's because I'm not interested.

I'm waffling now. Uninterrupted. Blah Blah Blah.

1 comment:

  1. hahaha very funny - like the 'paranoia in the playground' bit....x