I've been hearing a lot lately about Gwyneth Paltrow's website goop.com so I decided to check it out. It's supposedly really successful & popular and I'm pretty sure she gets more hits than I do. But you know what, it's bor-ingggg. The only interesting bit was where mate Stella McCartney and Gwyneth herself wrote about their day and the way they balance work/family. It made me laugh because it was such a load of crap. They have car services, chefs, nannies, assistants and, errrr, money that makes their day a hell of a lot easier. Gwynnie should bloody well come round here and try to get my kids to eat brown rice/sweet potato stirfry.
World's apart G and me.
So it got me thinking about which celebrity mums that I really like. Here's a little list:
BRITNEY SPEARS: Who can forget her very public meltdown/driving with kid on lap/shaved headed moments. General lack of care when with her kids. Love it. So goddamn real and not dissimilar to me.
DINA LOHAN: Makes no secret of living off Lindsay's success. And when LiLo is in court, she pushes the other daughter to make money through her music career. It's so how I will be with my kids - when they fly the nest I intend to milk them for all they've got.
SHARON OSBOURNE: Swearing, drinking, drugs and a successful reality show. Sharon has it all.
OCTOMUM: At first Nadya Suleman's feat of giving birth to eight babies seemed pretty amazing. Then we found out that she's an ex stripper, single, unemployed, already mother of six. It's so irresponsible you've got to admire her balls.
KERRY KATONA: Actually I can't stand her.
Gwyneth can piss off for all I care. And so can Jules Oliver, Myleene Klass etc.etc. They are not real. They are Robot Mums. My kids could beat their kids up anyday.
What a role model I am.